Tuesday Blog Hop

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To- The-Top Tuesday Blog Hop

Nurse Mommy

E is recovering slowley each day.  Most mornings she wakes up happy and talkative then slowly into the afternoon her mouth starts hurting and she becomes tired.  She is doing a great job of dealing with the pain and annoyance of her restrictions.  She has been obsessed lately with Toy Story 2.  We watch it like 5 times a day!  I can't wait for this whole process to be behind us. 

E trying to hid from the camera.  Getting ready to leave the hospital.  The diaper on her arm is protecting her from trying to pull her IV out. 

Post Op

Wednesday morning E had her surgery (tonsils and adenoids removed).  It was awful.  How else can you describe what my baby went through?  Right before the surgery they tried giving her a sedative (liquid red medicine) which she fought.  So then I had to go into the OR with her and hold her while they put her to sleep with gas.  The image of my baby asleep and limp get transferred to the bed is an image I'll never forget.  Then we sat in the waiting room for the longest 45 minutes.  Thank GOD everything went smoothly and was right on time.  I was so excited I got to see her the minute they  finished until I saw the state she was in.  She still half asleep, her body was moving and she was crying.  She wasn't recognizing that it was me holding her so she was fighting it.  Then the nurse said she had to give her some morphine.  So after the first (yes I said first) dose she woke up and still was crying in main.  So fifteen minutes later she got her second dose of morphine which finally calmed her down.  I just held her and kept whispering in her ear "Mommy's here.  Mommy's here" over and over and over.  I'm not sure who I was trying to calm her or me.  After that we got transferred to her room where we would stay through the rest of the day and till Thursday morning.  We got the shitty end of the room which meant I  we would be sitting and sleeping in a recliner chair.  E was in and out of naps and not a happy camper.  She wouldn't drink and fought every nurse who tried to give her medicine.  Not to mention she had an iv in her arm which had to have a diaper over it to keep E from trying to remove it.  We basically got 2 hours of sleep that night in between the nurses chatting loudly in the hall, monitors beeping, our baby neighbor sharing our room crying every hour, and nurses walking in and out of the room. 
I was so excited to get up and leave Thursday morning but the doctor kindly said E was not allowed home until she started drinking more.  So I said E if you want to go home you better start drinking.  And she did.  Not a lot but enough to allow us home.  So now we are ending our second night at home and boy is good to be home. 
I feel so lucky and blessed that her surgery went well and that E is recovering wonderfully.  I am so thankful that it was only a "small" surgery and is other wise healthy.  But, at the same time was stressful and hated every minute of watching my baby go through what she did.

You are my sunshine

I love the sunshine.  I love the warm sun, the bright flowers, all the activities you can do on a nice day.  Everything about a sunny day I love.  Apparently those thoughts don't fall far from the tree...

We ran outside after a random drizzle storm to see a rainbow (right behind her)

She's had an interest in playing baseball

Baking sugar cookies

do a "trick" in the grass

I just saw that my last blog was a few weeks ago! I got so side tracked with reading my daily favorite blog posts that I forgot to update my own. 

I've had a stomach ache for about 2 weeks now, and I'm pretty sure it's because my daughter is scheduled for surgery next month.  She is finally having her tonsils and adenoids removed to hopefully cure her Sleep Apnea.  How can I not feel nervous and anxious over it?? 

What's new with me you ask? Well, I've put myself back out there.  What does that mean?  I'm finally ready to move on from my divorce.  I've basically been wearing sweat pants and throwing my hair into a pony tail for the last 2 1/2 years, and I forgot how much work it is to actually do my hair and wear regular clothes.  But it sure has boosted my confidence and made me feel good about myself.  I think what is most important is that I've learned to be by myself and to be ok with it.  It was really hard for me to learn that I don't need to be in a relationship in order to be happy. 

Anyways, I started reading Eat Love Pray.  I'm only on page 40, but I have a feeling this book will be an inspirational one.  That's all for now!

Stars and Stripes

Love this adorable picture. Funny thing is it's outside Coco's because E was tired of sitting!

                                              Can you believe we had to wear sweatshirts on the 4th???

I'm wishing, I'm wishing...

Finding myself again

Ellie and I have an amazingly close attachment.  Which is good and bad.  Last summer around 18 months she began to realize we we're not "one" that we were two separate people because I had to go to work and she had to go to preschool.  It was a tough summer but we did it!

  Now, at 2 1/2 where she is spending a few hours twice a week with her Dad I've found myself thinking what do I do without her?? I mean I am used to spending all my time and energy with my daughter.  Whatever she wants to play we play, wherever she wants to go, we go; whatever she wants to eat, we eat.  But I think in the process I've forgotten again about being my own person.  I rarely go out because I feel guilty leaving her when it's my "days".  But the more time she's been spending with her Dad, I've come to realize it's okay to be happy while she is temporarily away.  It's ok for me to wander around a store and actually be able to try things on.  But more than that I've come to turns with missing my baby but still being able to be happy with my own time.